While binge-watching Criminal Minds, a close personal friend of mine (restraining order pending), Dr. Spencer Reid, let me know about a Fear of Property called Orthophobia. This Fear basically means the idea of having or owning your own possessions frightens you and you may instead live a minimalistic life. Reid also let me know he’s a big fan of my work and that I am not delusional or have an inflated self-ego. And that’s coming from a TV Doctor, so you know it’s true.
Investing in Your Fear of Property
Having a Fear of Property is like a specific form of Fear of Commitment. For some people, the idea of having something that is yours is horrifying. Knowing you have to care for it. Watch it. Nurture it. Not burn it down. Those things can cause a lot of stress for even the calmest of cucumbers. These people may instead choose a life of hopping from one house to the next on short-term leases or embrace the lifestyle of the vagabond. You know, no fixed address. Always walking around with those cool sticks with the little sacks on the end. Those people have a Fear of Property. If having an address scares you, try having a mortgage! Who’s with me? Let me know on Facebook.
Having a Fear is totally normal. With that said, you know what’s weird about having Orthophobia? It’s not limited to just major purchases like a house, a dog, owning an abundance of dogs, or buying a doghouse. It can be for smaller, materialistic possessions too. People with this Fear often distance themselves from questions like “hey, is that yours?” or statements like “I think you left your (insert item here) on my lawn”. Upon hearing things like this, they will put their hands up in denial and walk away slowly. It’s like Fear of Confrontation meets Fear of Online Shopping into one convenient sentence to encourage you to read two additional posts. I mean, you’re already here. Might as well stay a while. Tell your friends too.
Owning Your Fear of Property
Having a Fear of Property is difficult. You might spend your life working for the man, saving up to buy something pretty for yourself, only to realize the idea of buying something scares you. On the plus side, you’ll never have to deal with having buyer’s remorse. I am just full of these links to other posts today! Probably going to have more coming up, fair warning.
As you know, one of the easiest ways to get over any Fear is to play a slightly comparable board game version of the phobia. If you have a Fear of Getting Sick, play Operation. Struggle with having a Fear of Snakes? Play CandyLand. It’s as simple as that. In this case, having a Fear of Property would be a great excuse to wrangle up your friends and family for a civilized game of Monopoly. You can practice buying property spaces, houses, hotels, and even experiment with going to prison. The game truly offers something for everybody. This isn’t one of those #Ads where I push products on you because I benefit from your purchases. Not like me trying to send you to Amazon to buy one of my books. I just really want to play Monopoly.