Now I know you are probably thinking “yikes! monsters!” or something along those lines. Or maybe I’m way off on that. Before things get too convoluted and spooky, this Top 10 Monsters list is going to be focused on cult classics, fictitious creatures and all things which occasionally go bump in the night and rank them in order of least likely to haunt your dreams to probably living under your bed right now.
For as long as mankind has been hesitant to enter a swamp, an abandoned building, the catacombs of an unholy temple or explore a barren wasteland known for its unforgiving terrain and mysterious disappearances, monsters have been to blame for many a campfire story. I will try to refrain from references like Lochness or Vampires which were both already featured in the first Things I Fear book, but try to act surprised if it does happen.
Let’s jump into the Top 10 Monsters List before a better idea for a list comes to mind:
10. Werewolf – A Werewolf is basically a cross between an over-sized, rabid wolf and someone who needs help understanding the concept of man-scaping. These creatures have been known to roam the streets of London but have also been spotted in other cities around the world after someone discovers a moon in the sky and begins to Animorph (remember how cool those book covers were?)
9. Slender Man – Not sure if this technically counts as a monster but what else would you classify Slender Man as? It waltzes through forests in search of people who either believe or don’t believe in it and then does something to them. The internet is pretty divided on what it does or does not do so it’s hard to write about. It almost inspired a terrible movie that was given worse reviews than some of the classic bad movies written about on this site. Perhaps that just adds to the intrigue!
8. Godzilla – Picture your favourite reptilian creature and then make it over 300 feet tall with the ability to breathe this weird fire thing. That’s Godzilla and it’s been terrorizing Hollywood movie fans for decades. Though there is no proof it actually does exist in real life, there is also no proof suggesting it doesn’t actually exist. So consider that.
7. Chupacabra – At a staggering nearly 4 feet tall, Chupacabra is sort of the forgotten blood-sucking creature in the world of vampiristic deities. It makes a living by draining the blood of unsuspecting goats across South America but has been known to be featured in grainy photographs and obviously staged videos as well. Truly the stuff of legends.
6. The Blob – Name one thing worse than a gelatinous entity that grows in size each time it consumes a human being. The Blob can move at tremendously slow speeds as it glides across town in search of the next victim to succumb to its…blobiness? It also cannot be killed and in the movie can only be transported away which isn’t exactly the most comforting way to guarantee safety.
5. Boogeyman – With a name like Boogeyman, you know it’s scary. But also not that scary because it’s called Boogeyman and that’s ridiculous. By definition, the Boogeyman does not have an available description or any distinct identifiable features which basically means it’s a concept for you to interpret anyway you want. Let your imagination run wild and hope it doesn’t come true.
4. Medusa – If you already have a Fear of Snakes, you’re probably not a fan of monsters with hair made out of these reptiles. In addition to this interesting fashion statement, Medusa also has the ability to turn you into stone for having the audacity of looking at her. Not really sure what else she does but no one has been spotted wearing a “I met Medusa and all I got was this t-shirt” shirt so it’s hard to say.
3. Dragons – The jury is still out on whether or not these creatures actually did exist at one point. If they did, that’s a horrifying thought for anyone who isn’t into the idea of a gigantic, fire-breathing lizard soaring through the skies. Classic examples of Dragons in pop culture include the dragon from Shrek that falls in love with the horse and that sassy one from Mulan. There are no other examples of Dragons in pop culture.
2. Megalodon – If you thought a 15 foot shark was scary, imagine how you might feel in the open ocean next to a 50 foot monster who wouldn’t even need to chew to devour you. Think of the whale from Pinocchio but somehow scarier and more prehistoric like a dinosaur with something to prove. Many scientists believe this creature is still lurking within the depths of the ocean and ready to make a comeback.
1. Grim Reaper – By the time you realize “hey, I know that guy!” you’re probably already dead. The Grim Reaper has one purpose in life which is death. Walking the earth wearing a black cloak with a scythe in hand, the Grim Reaper also enjoys fine wine and banishing your soul to the depths of Hell.
Do you agree or disagree with our Top 10 Monsters list? Contact us and let us know or post a comment in blind rage on our Facebook page.
