Imagine: Your dream job calls you and says if you can get there within the hour, you can become the next CEO. (It happens more often than you might think). Easy! You live 20 minutes away, your car was already idling in the driveway anyway and your fancy, three-piece suit was just dragged out of the closet with minimal stains! You get into your car with a smile, look over your shoulder as you slowly reverse, and it’s a line of brake lights behind you that are completely blocking you from even leaving your house. An hour goes by and you’ve moved 6 inches. Your once deliciously hot beverage has now turned into a chilled puddle of regret. Your potential employer calls (you answer through Bluetooth because you respect the law and have a nice car) and they say they’re moving in a different direction because you took too long. They are now splitting the role with the first 5 people to Tweet at their company. All because of traffic! This is exactly why some people have a Fear of Traffic.
Fear of Traffic in Total Gridlock
Okay, maybe it doesn’t happen exactly that way every time, but we can all relate to the feeling of being trapped behind a long line of cars that only seem to appear when you urgently need to get somewhere. Or every morning and evening on the way to and from work. Or weekends. Or anywhere there’s a popular event. Or always, regardless of the day, time, location or activity involved. Traffic is the worst. Sometimes the traffic is so bad you basically end up just parking on the highway with enough time to contemplate some pretty serious life-altering questions where you rediscover something about yourself that you wouldn’t have otherwise thought of. So maybe traffic isn’t all bad.
Whether you are driving 15 feet to the mailbox because you’re too good to just walk, you are driving 15,000 feet to the luxurious vacation hot spot down the street or you are driving standard and can’t actually measure how far you’ve gone because you are too focused on shifting gears, there are lots of reasons to have a Fear of Traffic. You get into your car and can barely pull out of the driveway before you are met with an onslaught of honking horns, passive-aggressive lane changes and a single shoe on the side of the road.
Taking the Off-Ramp on Your Fear of Traffic
The long line of unblinking, red lights mock you from both close and far. Their painted metal frames surround you from every side. The only change in their otherwise unwavering static dance is the turn signal used by someone desperate to leave a long row of cars for an equally long row of cars. Their sudden, sporadic movements a reminder that things don’t always get better. The sound of a thousand horns blaring at no one in particular fills the sky. And what’s this? Someone’s car has pulled over to the side of the road with no apparent damage and no signs of distress at all? This is big news! Everyone slow down and look! Quickly, before nothing changes!
If you have a Fear of Traffic, consider moving to a place that has no traffic or no other signs of human life at all. Traffic isn’t all bad though. At least you get to focus on all those people singing in their cars, shoving their fingers deep within the catacombs of their nasal cavities and maybe even discovering a long, lost friend who is presently sharing your misery.